Welcome to our Mini zoo

I realized it’s pretty rude of me to have never introduced you to our mini zoo. You might recognize these guys from the header at the top of my blog. In addition to Betty White the dog, our furry family also includes the critters below.

Meet Maude. When she’s not conquering T-Rex’s, she’s tossing her poop and scritching her nose after a dust bath. She used to be BFFs with Ethel, who sadly passed away over a year ago. Maude hasn’t been the same without her partner-in-crime, but she still manages to stay busy by slaying dinosaurs and the like.

Maudeasaurus was my first pet (apart from the family pets I grew up with of course), who I adopted mid-college. I waited until I had my own room and put the bunk bed to the top setting so her ginormous cage could fit underneath the bed. We weren’t allowed to have pets at on-campus apartments, so I usually blasted the tv when we had room inspections so people couldn’t hear the stirrings of a little white chinchilla. What can I say, I’m totally a rebel. Instead of smoking pot or drinking, I spent my time nuzzling Maude and watching America’s Next Top Model. Any cool cred points I had previously are now lost, but that’s a risk I was willing to take to share the cuteness with you all!

This is Willie Nelson. He was my first ever bunny. He was actually a she for a few months (Willamena Nelson), or at least I thought, until I discovered his Mammoth-sized bunny balls. I got him a few months before graduating college for my birthday when he stole my heart with his loppy cuteness. I was smitten.

99% of the time he can be found humping his boyfriend, Eeyore. At first I felt bad for the little donkey, but he’s been a lot less gloomy since Willie Nelson hopped into his life.

*For my Weddingbee friends, yes that is a candy corn toy in the background (aka Cadbury’s boyfriend).

This is Cadbury (sometimes called Cadbunny). The local SPCA had one of their bunny adoption events at PetSmart, where this chocolate bunny made me flail with delight. He looked like he needed major hugs so I couldn’t resist. I took him to a few vets where they insisted he was male, despite me not seeing any boy bunny bits down there. I couldn’t help but notice he/she was having some behavioral issues. He was very anxious and whenever I fed him—he put all of the hay in his mouth and ran around frantically.

A few days passed and I woke up to be greeted by little dark lumps on the kitchen floor. At first I just assumed Betty White pooped in the middle of the night (this was not a rare occurrence at the time). That is, until I saw the poop moving across the floor. There were five of them and upon further review, it was decided that they were the cutest little freaking baby bunnies I have ever seen. It was also decided that I needed to get a new vet that could actually identify a bunny vajayjay.

Unfortunately Cadbury did not take to motherhood. The SPCA told her she was a dude for a large majority of her life, so who could blame her for being out of sorts. She was very aggressive toward the babies and tried clawing at them and hurting them. One of the five did not make it. It broke my heart to have one of the babies die. I was told by many that it was likely none of the babies would live, given the circumstances of their mother being so aggressive. I refused to believe that. I separated the babies from their mother and brought them into her cage one by one to slowly feed them several times a day. Days turned into weeks and before I knew it, they were all grown up.

The buns were getting to the age where they could start to make babies themselves, so it was time to find them owners before things got incest-y. I found happy homes for all of them, except one. The runt of the litter, who was originally wounded by Cadbury and grew a lot slower than the others because of it.

This little runt’s name is Applesauce, who is the baby of our family. At first I thought he was going to be a lop, since he had helicopter ears, but he is a rex like his mom. I know Cadbury sounds like a total jerk, but it is sadly fairly common for bunny moms to get aggressive toward their litter. Let’s be honest, I’m sure she was still bitter from being bunny raped at the SPCA. When I adopted her, Cadbury had bites on her ears and wounds on her body, which I’m sure is from trying to flee from not-so-romantic bunny love. Anyway, Applesauce forgives Cadbury for being a crap mom and Cadbury forgives Applesauce for his unbelievable cuteness.

I mean, come on.

Willie still thinks he’s the stud of the pack, and I can’t really argue. He’s kind of a show stealer when it comes to the ladies.

Speaking of the ladies, Betty White is so bored by a non-dog related post. She is totally rolling her eyes as I type.

Are there any readers out there who are also pet crazy? How many pets do you have and what are their names? Share, share!

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Happy Thanksgiving!

I’ve never been so grateful before, so it’s only fitting that this Thanksgiving I celebrate the change and happiness the past year has brought. I am thankful for living in an apartment in the wilderness, even if I’m surrounded by flying squirrels, bats and snakes. I’m thankful for living with my boyfriend who has given me a second chance that I never thought was possible. I’m thankful for my neurotic dog who has finally stopped pooping and peeing on my bed at 2am. I’m thankful for chocolate milk and Cheez-its. I’m thankful for tights and ugly dresses. I’m thankful for toothpaste, because God only knows I brush my teeth more than any other person on the planet apart from my mother. I’m thankful for traveling on a plane for the first time in my life this year. I’m thankful for my family and how supportive they have been (Mom, don’t take offense to being listed after the toothpaste…I really love toothpaste!). I’m thankful for my friends for being my friends when there are so many other sane-ish people out there to choose from. I’m also thankful for lucking out with the best second fam on the planet and being so welcomed within Pete’s family (I’m also thankful for Mr. Schuster’s epic potato salad, now that I think about it). I’m thankful for being employed and having co-workers who accept me despite my random vulgar remarks. I could go on and on, but I’ll spare you.

*CliffsNotes version: I’m super thankful. Thanks for stopping by my blog and taking the time to read it. Now go eat some stuffing and socialize with your family (and by socialize with your family I mean watch football)!